Monday, September 4, 2017

Stages of A Relationship (Or How to Stay Married)

                

Stage One (Dating)
Woman: “Dear, could you put the box in the car, please? Thank you.”
Man: Shrugs his shoulders and puts the box in the car.

Stage Two (Honeymoon)
Woman: “Forget the box.”
Man: Smiles and carries his bride inside.

Stage Three (Newlywed)
Woman: “Honey, could you please put the box in the car?” Whispers in his ear: “I’ll make it worth your while.”
Man: Smiles, shrugs his shoulders and throws the box in the car.

Stage Four (Fifth Anniversary)
Woman: “Put the box in the car, please.”
Man: Starts to reply, stops himself, shrugs his shoulders and puts the box in the car.

Stage Five (Tenth Anniversary)
Woman: “Put the box in the car.”
Man: Stands with his arms across his chest, stares at the box for five minutes, shrugs his shoulders, then puts it in the car.

Stage Six (Twentieth Anniversary)
Woman: “Put the damn box in the car.”
Man: Picks up the box, muttering to himself, drops it three or four times, then shrugs his shoulders and puts it in the car.

Stage Seven (Thirtieth Anniversary)
Woman: “Why isn’t this box in the car?”
Man: Shrugs his shoulders and puts the box in the car.