“I’m back,” I announced
as I walked through the back door to the clinic. “Did you miss me?”
I hadn’t worked a shift
at the Night Clinic for two months. A required rotation through the ICU had me on call every
other night. Miss James turned and walked away, silently.
What
did I do to her? Went through my mind as I watched those
shapely legs and derriere disappear into the supply room.
She emerged a few
seconds later and gave me a big smile.
“Of course I’ve missed
you,” she finally answered. “No monsters or superheros or dragons for months.”
“So, you heard about my
last little adventure, a bit scary at least for a few moments. Maybe tonight
will be different. I say we should have a nice boring shift. Nothing but sick
babies, winos, hookers with STD’s, stabbings, gunshots, and drug overdoses for
a change.”
“You’re cute,” she
remarked, patting my cheek. “Speaking of winos, there’s one waiting for you in
Exam three, Alvin, a regular; diabetic, congestive heart failure, obese, drinks
about a quart a day. Says he’s short of breath.”
I gave her my best
Groucho Marx leer and picked up the chart on the door. Alvin was fifty-five
years old, had a list of medications a mile long and usually was seen at the
University Clinic. His vital signs were HR 80, BP 210/90, RR 28, O2 sat 88%. I
took a deep breath and went in to see him.
“Hello, Mr. Gates, I’m
Dr. Barnes,” I introduced myself, smiling and I held out my hand to shake his.
He was sitting on the edge of the exam table, staring at the floor. His lips
were a slightly blue and he was taking short rapid breaths.
“I’m sorry, Dr. Barnes.
I mean for not getting up. I can’t seem to catch my breath.”
“When did you notice
you were having difficulty?” Alvin was very large, his weight on the chart was
listed as 350 pounds, but I would have guessed he was at least 450. He was
dressed in a sleeveless t-shirt and dirty khaki pants, the tops of which were
hidden by his massive belly. The t-shirt was drenched in sweat. He had worn out
sandals on his feet, one of the straps replaced by some rough twine. The smell
of dried sweat and spoiled wine filled the room.
“I never breathe real
good, but it was last night. I guess I forgot to take my meds.”
“Forgot for how long?”
I asked as I fastened an oxygen mask around his head, which was in addition to
the nasal cannula he already sported. The pulse oximeter fell to 84 while he
was talking, but rose to 89 with the additional oxygen.
“I guess I missed going
to the clinic last week and then I ran out of some of my medicines, but I just
took double the dose of some of the others; I figured it would be OK. I guess I
was wrong.”
“Can you tell me what
you did take?”
“Let’s see. I took four
of the big blue ones, no five, and one of the little white pills, three green
capsules. I used the big inhaler and the small one two times yesterday and two
times today. Took my water pill…”
Alvin’s voice trailed
off as he turned a darker shade of blue.
“Alvin…ALVIN,” I
shouted as I stood up and shook him.
“Wha…oh sorry Dr.
Barnes. Sometimes that narcolepsy catches up with me. Where was I? Oh, yeah,
pills.”
“Never mind, Alvin. I
think you need to be at the hospital. We’ll call an ambulance.”
I left the room and
asked Miss James to call the University ambulance crew. I started an IV on poor
Alvin, drew some basic labs and Miss James did an EKG. Alvin’s lungs crackled
everywhere and his feet and ankles were giant tree trunks of brownish edema,
but, surprisingly, no ulcers.
I gave him 80 of Lasix
and waited for the ambulance.
While Miss James sat
with him I treated a two year old with an earache, a drug addict with an
infected arm, splinted a sprained ankle and broken finger. When the ambulance
finally arrived I helped load Alvin onto the stretcher and wished him well as
he rolled out the door.
I was looking forward
to a few moments of quiet when I heard a loud thud outside the clinic door and
a car’s squealing tires as it raced away. Miss James and I investigated the
noise and found a young woman, a young and very attractive woman, passed out on
our doorstep. Her beauty would have rivaled Helen of Troy with long black hair,
soft white skin and bright red lips. She was dressed in a royal blue dress
which clung to her every curve and had dark blue boots which came up to her
knees. There was a ring on her left hand with a large blue stone which sparkled
in the waiting room light.
We managed to get her
into Exam room one. All the while she didn’t move, didn’t open her eyes, didn’t
even moan. She just lay like a rag doll on my exam table. She had no ID, no
purse, no place to hide any money.
“If she’s a working
girl, she’s done a good job of hiding her earnings,” I commented.
“Probably robbed, hit
over the head and dumped here,” Miss James concluded.
I listened to her heart
which was clear and regular, her pulse was strong, lips, fingers, toes all
pink, her respirations were regular. Pulse oximeter read 99%.
“She looks quite serene
lying there on the table, almost like she’s been enchanted,” Miss James
observed.
Her words were
prescient as a loud noise, followed by shouting, came from the waiting room. I
ran out to see about all the commotion and found seven “little” people at the
reception desk, one was banging on the bell and another was pounding his
walking stick on the desk.
“May I help you, Mr…” I
asked. The dwarf was about three feet tall, with a large red nose and a long
gray beard. He was dressed in a black suit and had a gold ring in his left ear.
“Where is she?” he
demanded banging his stick on the reception desk. “Where is Crystal Blue?”
“And you are…?”
“Sleazy, if you must
know. And behind me are Slutty, Skanky, Busty, Hunky, Tiny and Norman.”
“Seven dwarfs, huh?” I
observed. “I would have thought you would have been named Happy, Sneezy,
Bashful, Dopey, Grumpy, Sleepy and Doc.”
“We prefer ‘little
people’ and those would be silly names for us. But, back to the matter at hand.
Where is Crystal Blue? She works for me and I expect her out on that stage in
ten minutes.”
Miss James appeared and
exclaimed, “You’re from that place over on 14th, the “Enchanted
Room.”
“If you please, nurse,
it’s the ‘The Enchanted Emporium Club’ a place where men and women can leave
all their worries and cares behind,” Sleazy explained. “Now getting back to
Crystal…”
“One moment please,”
Miss James said and then motioned for me to follow her.
“Legally, we can’t let
these little people do anything or even see Crystal Blue, assuming that is her
name. Maybe, we should call the police.”
“Perhaps,” I answered,
“but no one has broken any laws and our first responsibility is to our comatose
patient. The dwarfs will have to wait.”
I went back to the
reception desk and spoke to Sleazy.
“Crystal Blue, if that
is her name, is sick. She seems to be asleep and won’t wake up. I certainly
cannot release her to just anyone and she is in no condition to perform. You
and your companions are welcome to wait for her here in the waiting room.”
I left them and went
back to attend to my patient. By this time some of the tests were available.
“Let’s see,” I mumbled.
“CBC is normal, chemistry normal, pregnancy test negative, UA negative, tox
screen negative. Chest X-Ray…whoa, what’s that?”
I stared at the film.
The lungs were clear, but the cardiac silhouette was more than unusual. It
looked like an apple; not just a vague apple-like appearance. It looked like
someone had taken the outline of a perfect apple and pasted it where her heart
was supposed to be.
Some
new tropical disease? Apple fever? Apple poisoning? Maybe I should begin
looking for the evil queen. As these thoughts
popped into my head Miss James appeared.
“A new patient has just
arrived, Dr. Barnes,” she announced.
“Nothing too serious I
hope, Miss James. I’m sort of in a quandary with Miss Blue.”
“I think you are going
to want to see her right away. She’s been beaten up pretty badly.”
“OK, OK, I’ll be right
there.”
I took a quick look at
Crystal Blue before I left. She lay on the table quietly breathing, her chest
silently heaving up and down.
I
guess she’s OK.
My new patient was in
the exam room next door. Miss James was hard at work removing her tight
fitting, sequined body suit. There were bruises on her face and arms and as the
suit slowly came off there was a bruising and abrasions across her chest,
abdomen and pelvis.
“Do we have a name,
Miss James.”
“You won’t believe
this, but this is the Wicked Queen. At least that’s her stage name. Her real
name is Margaret Henson.”
“Don’t tell me. She
works at the Enchanted Emporium Club as a dancer.”
I gave her a quick
exam. Her vital signs were normal, she was breathing normally and, although
groggy, she was able to answer questions.
“Ms. Henson, I’m Dr.
Barnes. Can you tell me what happened?”
“Wha..what happened?”
she asked as she gradually became more alert. She started to sit up, but winced
and then lay back down.
“It looks like you’ve
been roughed up pretty badly. What hurts the most?”
“My chest, every time I
try to breathe.”
I’d already put oxygen
on her and Miss James had an IV running in her left arm.
“Any abdominal pain?” I
began taking a more thorough history.
“No, just my chest, on
the right side.”
I pulled up her spandex
top and saw bruising all across her chest and upper abdomen.
“Do You have any
medical problems, take any medicine regularly, any allergies?” I asked.
“No, no and no. I don’t
smoke, drink alcohol, or use any type of illicit drugs. My only vice is that I
take off my clothes to entertain degenerate men and once in a while leave with
one, if he is cute enough and rich enough.”
She finished her speech
and then winced as she took a deep breath.
“Well, Ms. Henson. If I
were a betting man, I would wager that you have some fractured ribs on the
right side. We’ll get a Chest X-ray just to be sure. Can you tell me what
happened?”
“I was ambushed.
Somebody snuck up behind me and ‘WHAM’ on the back of my head, then ‘Whack’
across my chest. Next thing I know this cute doctor is standing over me poking
and prodding and feeling all my unmentionable parts.”
“It’s my job Ms.
Henson, figuring out what’s wrong and then trying to fix it. Now if you will
sit in this chair, Miss James will wheel you down the hall for an X-ray. In the
mean time I will have a little chat with the seven dwarfs.”
Miss James wheeled her
away, asking her what it was like to take off her clothes in front of a bunch
of strangers. I couldn’t hear the answer as they disappeared in the X-ray
suite. I went up to the reception area.
“Sleazy, could you come
back here, now,” I commanded.
All seven little people
followed him into exam room three.
I turned and addressed
Sleazy.
“Miss Henson accuses
you of assaulting her. Is she correct in her assessment? Before you say too
much, I must inform you that I am obligated to report the incident to the
police.”
“Miss Henson, the Wicked
Queen, you mean, or the Wicked Witch, as we like to call her, works for me and
is never happy. I’m sure she cannot name the name of her assailant as it is
obvious from her injuries that she was attacked from behind. I would also like
to add that it is almost certain that this Wicked Queen poisoned Crystal Blue
and she will most definitely try to bump her off again if she is allowed the
opportunity. That witch hates our poor Crystal.”
The other six dwarfs
echoed Sleazy’s sentiments.
“Why,” I inquired,
“this severe animosity between Ms. Henson and Ms. Blue?”
Sleazy sat down in the
lone chair, stroked his gray beard and began his story. His six companions sat
on the floor as the story commenced.
“I opened the Enchanted
Emporium about two years ago. My original intent was to create a place where
the outcasts of society could congregate without feeling self conscious. The
seven of us manage the club. We started just with a bar and a bunch of large TV
screens and video games, like every other bar and club. It was Norman who hit
on the idea of adding the live entertainment. So, we hired a few girls of various
size and shape. It wasn’t long before I learned that there are a lot of people
willing to take off their clothes for money and a lot of people who will pay to
see it. And, this is where we stand out from the crowd, it isn’t just the
mainstream ‘beautiful” girl who can find an audience. Fat, thin, tall, short,
young, old, every size and shape, male or female has an audience somewhere.
Surely, you’ve heard of our geriatric night? No? Well, it always draws them in.
but, I’m getting off the track.
“The Wicked Queen
started working about eighteen months ago and she was a big hit. She’s
beautiful in the traditional sense, all the attributes that make for a
successful dancer, big shapely chest, cute butt and she did magic. While she
performed she made snakes appear and change into birds, turned cats into dogs
and other such tricks. There was the time she made a particularly unruly patron
disappear; I don’t think he was ever found.
“Anyway, she ruled the
runway for more than a year. Until, Crystal showed up. Crystal Blue, that’s
even her real name, came from somewhere in the Midwest. She just got on the bus
and ended up here, running away or going somewhere, I don’t know and she has
never told us. I think she was lost on the streets for a while and wandered
into the Enchanted Emporium one night.
“Even through her
ragged clothes I could tell she was a real beauty with an air about her that
made her special. I’m not sure if it was her innocence or quiet charm, or what.
I do know that I and my fellow managers were captivated from the start. She
worked as a barmaid at first, but then asked if she could try her hand at
performing. She certainly had the look and she could sing, too.
“She doesn’t have the
typical exotic dancer body; only medium boobs, but very shapely tush, t she
radiates charm, however, and she has such a sweet voice. She was a big hit from
the start. Every time she was out on that stage it was magical. Well, you can
imagine the trouble, the jealousy, the envy. I’m not surprised it came to
this.”
At this moment Miss
James interrupted.
“Here’s the Chest X-ray
on the Wicked Queen, Dr. Barnes,” she reported.
“Excuse me fellas, but
I need to check this.”
As I suspected, the
Queen had fractured ribs four through ten on the right side with maybe a
contusion to the lung. There was no pneumothorax or effusion. I went and
checked on my two patients before hearing the rest of the story. Crystal Blue
continued in her serene and unrelenting sleep, while the Queen was sitting up
in the chair and appeared to be fairly comfortable. I informed her of the X-ray
results, listened to her chest again, checked her vital signs and abdomen. I
asked her to wait a bit longer so that I could evaluate her one more time
before she left, but I also hoped I could get some information on what had
happened to the comatose Ms. Blue.
I left and returned to
hear more of Sleazy’s story.
“Tell him about the
mirror,” one of the other dwarfs, Slutty, I think, interjected.
“Don’t tell me she has
a magic mirror on the wall, as in ‘Mirror, Mirror on the wall who’s the
sleaziest of them all?” I asked.
“No, no, nothing like
that, at least I don’t think so. She, does, however, stand in front of the
mirror for long periods of time, hours, it seems, primping her hair, talking to
herself. It’s a bit bizarre if you ask me. Old Mamba says it’s all just
vanity.”
“Who’s Old Mamba?” I
just had to ask.
“She’s our cleaning
lady, a withered old prune from Haiti. I think she’s about a million years
old,” Tiny explained, in a high squeaky voice. “But, she and the Wicked Queen
have some sort of thing going on, because they’re always together.”
“Tell me, Sleazy,” I
asked, “what happened to your star dancer tonight? Did Crystal Blue suffer some
sort of psychotic breakdown leaving her in a catatonic state? Or, did the
Wicked Queen trick her into eating a poisoned apple which plunged her into an
everlasting sleep only to be awakened by true love’s kiss? Or is it something
else?”
Miss James stuck her
head in the room at that moment.
“Chest pain in four; an
old black lady, looks like it might be bad.”
“On my way, Nurse,” I
replied. “We’ll pick this up in a few minutes, lads.” I left the little people
and went to attend to my patient. For some reason, Norman followed me.
“That’s Old Mamba,” he
cried out and all the other dwarfs suddenly appeared.
“You all need to wait
outside,” I said sternly and Miss James ushered them out.
I glanced at the
monitor and saws very elevated ST segments
on her EKG with an irregular rhythm with frequent PVC’s and a BP that
was 80/50.
“This does not look
good, Nurse. Mamba, can you hear me?”
My question was
answered by a long groan. Miss James was on the phone calling for an ambulance
as I started an IV, put oxygen on Old Mamba and started a Lidocaine infusion
along with low dose Dopamine. Her oxygen saturation was around ninety even with
O2. Her lungs had crackles from top to bottom.
“Get the crash cart,” I
mumbled, but Miss James was ahead of me.
“V fib,” I shouted. I
intubated the old woman as Miss James started CPR and warmed up the paddles to
shock the dying woman.
Epi, bicarb, bag,
shock, compress, repeat, nothing worked. I even brought the dwarfs in to help
with chest compressions, but we lost her.
After thirty minutes
the ambulance arrived and was sent away. Miss James went through the layers of poor
old Mamba’s clothing, which lay in a heap on the floor.
“What’s this?” she muttered
as she folded the dress.
Madame
Marie’s Incantations and Spells: The Complete Guide to Withcraft and Voodoo by
Marie, Voodoo High Priestess
And, what’s this? Miss
James pulled out a likeness of Crystal Blue.
“Perhaps it was old
Mamba who put a spell on poor Crystal,” Busty remarked.
Miss James was thumbing
through the book.
“Dr. Barnes,” she
shouted out suddenly. “This particular spell is circled. It’s called the
‘Living Death’.”
“Let me look at that,
please,” I requested.
“Voodoo doll…lock of
hair…two dead chickens…incantation and
douse with…Miss James did you notice the funny smell in room one?”
“Come to think of it, I
did, sort of like cinnamon mixed with fruit.”
“That’s right, cinnamon
and apples. It looks like old Mamba cast this spell on poor Miss Blue. I
suspect our other patient, the
Queen, may be able to tell us more.
Queen, may be able to tell us more.
At this moment we all
heard a scream from Exam room two. All of us raced into the room and found
Norman standing on the exam table with a scalpel held to the throat of the
Wicked Queen.
“Admit it,” he screamed
with an almost comical high pitched voice, “tell everyone how you cursed poor
Crystal Blue. Say it or you’ll be joining Old Mamba.”
Skanky tried to calm
his companion. “Now, Norman, I know you have no great love for the Wicked
Queen, but are sure about her? I ask because the doctor and nurse found this in
Old Mamba’s clothes.”
He held up the voodoo
doll and book. Norman only squinted and then held the knife tighter to the
Wicked Queen’s throat so that drops of blood started to well up.
Busty stepped in and
started to approach Norman.
“Norman, Norman, I know
you’re upset about our dear Crystal Blue. She’s always been so sweet and loving.
Even if the Queen did cast a spell, do we want to stoop down to her level?”
Busty voice was even
higher than Norman’s. She (or was it he) had smooth skin, except for a bit of
stubble on the chin and a big chest, but her manner was very masculine.
“Busty used to be
Brutus, before all the treatment and surgery,” Slutty whispered to me. Busty
kept right on walking towards Norman. Norman started to hold the knife even
tighter against the Queen’s throat as blood started to run down her neck. Busty
stopped and Norman relaxed for a moment.
“Ow,” Norman squeaked.
Miss James grabbed his
arm as she pulled the needle from his buttock and the Wicked Queen broke free
from Norman’s hold. Norman slowly slumped to the ground as I ran to examine the
Queen’s wounds, then held a wad of sterile gauze against the laceration to stop
the bleeding. She broke away from me and delivered a sharp kick to Norman’s
side.
I finally reached the
point where I just couldn’t take it any more.
I yelled at the top of
my lungs, “EVERYONE STOP, JUST STOP, RIGHT NOW.” I let my voice drop a few
decibels as Miss James joined me at my side.
“Now, listen, all of
you. There will be no more knives or spells or anything. Everyone out to the
waiting room and sit. Not you, Ms. Henson, not until I can check your neck more
closely to see if you need any stitches. Miss James, would you please call the
police and the Coroner for Old Mamba. Thank you.”
The seven dwarfs slowly
made their way out to the waiting room. Sleazy started to speak, but I held up
my finger gesturing for him to be silent. I examined the Queen’s neck more
closely. The cut was superficial and had stopped bleeding. I cleaned it with
Betadine, then dried it, steri stripped it closed and applied a new, sterile
dressing. I then motioned for her and Miss James to follow me out to the
waiting room.
The Queen sat alongside
the seven dwarfs, while Miss James stood by me. I stared out at a bizarre
scene, the wicked Queen dressed in black Spandex, seven “little” people
sporting beards, dressed in outfits ranging from seventies leisure suits to
Sleazy’s black suit and red bow tie. I paused for a moment before I spoke. Sleazy
tried to speak, but I signaled that he should be silent.
“You have made this one
of the more unusual night’s we’ve experienced here art the Clinic,” I began, “and
that is quite a trick considering some of the bizarre things that manage to
pass through those doors. But, we have had assaults, magical spells and death
join us here and it is now time to get to the bottom of this. I will start with
you, Ms. Henson. Do you have knowledge regarding the illness which has come
upon Crystal Blue?”
At first the Queen just
sat there.
“I promise you, Ms.
Henson, that if you are truthful your diminutive employers will do you no more
harm. Isn’t that so Mr. Sleazy?”
I waited for a reply
and then repeated, a bit more forcefully, “I said, isn’t that so Mr. Sleazy?”
“Yeah…” he answered,
barely audible.
“What?” I responded.
“Yes, we won’t hurt her
anymore,” Sleazy answered, clearly. His six companions nodded in agreement.
“Now, Ms. Henson, what
do you know about voodoo and witchcraft, as practiced by the now deceased Old
Mamba?”
The Queen looked around
and seemed a bit embarrassed, but finally spoke.
“I did mention, one
time, to Old Mamba, that I wished Crystal Blue was gone. That I had been the
top girl until she showed up. But, that’s all. I never asked her to do anything.
Well, maybe she saw me moping about and she would ask me what was wrong and I’d
point to something blue or make some sort of gesture. I never thought she would
or even could cast such a spell.”
“But, you are always
doing magic as part of your act,” Sleazy observed.
“Sure, cheap parlor
tricks I learned from an old boyfriend, pull some flowers from a hat or make a
bird disappear. You never saw me do anything else, did you?” the Queen asked,
her question directed to everyone listening.
There was a general murmuring
that actually did agree with her.
“It seems, however, that
Old Mamba has managed to cast a true spell, or drug or hypnotize or something
to Ms. Blue; there is no question,” I observed. “Living Death. That’s the spell
she circled in her voodoo book. Do any of you know anything about it; how to
break the spell?”
“In the old story, it
was true love’s kiss what worked,” one of the dwarfs, Hunky, I think, remarked.
“Well, that may be as
good a place to start as any,” I decided. I, for one, was stumped. Narcan didn’t
do anything; allowing time for a drug to metabolize wasn’t accomplishing
anything. There was no mark on Crystal that would suggest she was injected with
anything. Her liver, renal, and respiratory function were all normal. She just
wouldn’t wake up. She did not respond to any neurologic stimulus, no posturing,
no localizing of pain, no eye opening, nothing. And she looked peaceful, so
peaceful sleeping, just sleeping. We didn’t have a CT Scanner at the clinic,
but I had no doubt it would have been normal. I turned back to the dwarfs.
“True love’s kiss is as
good a place as any to start,” I announced. Do any of you know if she has a
boyfriend of any family?”
“She lives alone,”
Norman reported. “And, she’s never mentioned any family. She used to say that
our little emporium was her family. I guess it’s kind of sad.”
“Norman, don’t you have
a key to her apartment? Didn’t she give you one in case there was some sort of
emergency? This certainly qualifies as one,” Sleazy said.
“Yup, got it right
here,” and he held up a key ring with about a hundred keys on it.
“What’s with all the
keys?” I had to ask.
“Well, let’s see. This
one is to my apartment, this one is to the Emporium, this one is to my mom’s
house, the front door and this other is to her back door. This one goes to my
locker and …”
“Never mind, I get the
picture. Now go see what you can find and take someone with you.”
Skanky shot up his
hand. “I’ll go.”
“OK, OK, check it out
and bring back anything that will give us a clue as to the lovers in her life.
Oh and before you leave, why don’t you each give her a kiss; just in case one
of you is her true love.”
They looked at each
other with a smirk on their faces and then rushed into room one.
“Just on the cheek, you
two, and just a light kiss.”
They looked
disappointed as they each planted a light kiss on her cheek. Nothing
happened. They left to check out her
apartment.
Each dwarf in turn
planted a kiss on her cheek and even the Wicked Queen kissed her, all without
success.
“What we really need is
a handsome prince,” I remarked. For completeness sake Miss James and I also
kissed her, with, thankfully, no results. Once all this kissing was finished a
police car pulled up.
Officers Kreplock and
Jenson came in.
“Hey, Doc. Good evening
Miss James. What’s going on?”
I proceeded to recount
the events of the night with embellishments thrown in by Sleazy and Busty.
“So let me see if I’ve
got this straight,” Officer Kreplock summed up when we’d finished our story. “There
has been some sort of assault on a stripper named Crystal Blue and two assaults
on stripper Margaret Henson aka the Wicked Queen, the old cleaning lady from
the strip joint may have been one perpetrator, but she’s dead, while one or all
of these seven dwarfs may also be perpetrators. Meanwhile two of these dwarfs
are off on some sort of home investigation trying to find some clues as to the
identity of the now drugged or comatose Crystal Blue because you all have a
wild idea that ‘true love’s kiss’ will break the spell she’s under and wake her
up from her coma?”
“That’s it in a
nutshell, Officer,” I replied.
“Doc, you’ve been
watching too many late night movies. Let me call the hospital and get an
ambulance over here to take your comatose patient to the hospital.”
I looked him in the eye
and then looked through the open door into exam room one and the peacefully
sleeping Crystal Blue. I knew he was right to take her to the hospital. Still I’d
seen so many peculiar, bizarre occurrences, met innumerable weird and wonderful
and eccentric patients here at the clinic that a magic spell cast over one of
my patients just didn’t strike me as being much out of the ordinary, at least
for this
nighttime clinic.
“I’ll tell you what,
Officers,” I negotiated, “just wait to see what the two dwarfs, Norman and
Skanky discover. If we can’t wake Miss Blue up, then we’ll send her to the
hospital.”
“OK, Doc, as long as it’s
not too long a wait.”
“Oh, it shouldn’t be
long. Here they are now. What did you find?”
Norman walked in empty
handed.
“Well, her apartment is
pretty empty. Nothing on the walls, no photos, no computer, no diary, no
letters, nothing. But, while we were looking around we heard growling from the
bathroom and found him.”
Norman pointed outside
where Skanky was wrestling with a big headstrong German Shepherd.
“At first he growled at
us and bared his teeth as we searched around. But, I think he figured out we
were there to help, because he calmed down after a few minutes. As we were
leaving, feeling pretty much like failures he ran to the door with his leash in
his mouth. I didn’t think we had time to take him for a walk, but he wouldn’t
let us out the door unless we brought him along. I think he decided we would
take him to see our poor Crystal.”
“Keep him in the
waiting room for now, please,” I suggested, but then I thought for a moment. “No,
wait, let him free.”
Skanky and Norman
looked confused, but then released the dog. The beast started barking and then
bounded into exam room one and stood up on his hind legs and started licking
Crystal Blue’s face. As he did this there started to be flashing lights of red
and blue, a wind blew from nowhere and a white light engulfed the dog and Miss
Blue. We all stood by, dumbfounded, as the light and wind grew brighter and
stronger and then suddenly stopped.
I half expected to find
the room empty, while also half expecting Crystal Blue to walk out with a
handsome prince on her arm. And, she did walk out, only with her dog at her
side. The dog was not an enchanted prince. He was just a German Shepherd. He did
have a tag, however, with his name engraved upon it. In big white letters it
said “PRINCE.”
After this every one
filed out of the Clinic. News of the miraculous occurrences made the Enchanted
Emporium a top tourist attraction and the popularity caused Sleazy to tone down
some of the more unusual performances. Miss Henson and Miss Blue became fast
friends and started an act together, playing to packed houses up and down the
coast. Prince was prominently featured in the show.
After everyone had left
it was just about quitting time. Miss James and I had breakfast together.
“I guess there’s no
love like a dog’s love for its master. Prince sure proved that,” Miss James
sighed.
“Well, that is one kind
of love and I certainly believe it is true love. Maybe you and I can discover
some other type of love…”
Her eyes widened and
then she stared down at her bacon.
“Why Dr. Barnes…” and
she laughed as we finished our breakfast.
